For as long as humans have depended on the company of others to live, loneliness has existed as a universal feeling within us.
Whilst by no means should the issue of loneliness be laid entirely at the feet of the problems we face in our modern society, much that we often commonly describe in our time as one far more connected and socially accessible than it has ever been at any other point in history, this connection has in many ways removed us from the basic simplicity of being present with and enjoying the company of others and placed us in group environments that some humans are entirely ill-equipped and not adapted to deal with, the main consequences of this is leading often to feelings of isolation and social alienation amongst one’s peers.
Below are some of the many different reasons why rates of loneliness are rising, what the effects of these changes have been, as well as some ways that might help you combat your own personal feelings of loneliness.
Why Is Loneliness So Prevalent In Modern Times?
As previously mentioned, the world today has never been more connected than it currently is, and so it would seem entirely paradoxical that feelings of loneliness are not only still something we very often have to deal with today, but in fact feel as though they are more widespread now than they have been in decades.
Whilst the issue of loneliness remains complex and its causes are often a convergence of many different social and cultural factors, there are certainly some that greatly contribute to the prevalence of the problem today more so than others, a majority of them pertaining to either cultural changes or technological ones.
The Growth of the Internet and Social Media Platforms
Social media today has become something widely pervasive in our lives, to the point that many could either not see themselves being away from it for long periods of time, or doing so would make other aspects of life such as work and keeping up with friends significantly more difficult.
For some, it has been a part of their life for as long as they can remember, having grown up around the internet and social media platforms.
Due to the uniquely addictive nature of social media, it is easy for many users to fall into the habit of using it for many hours a day, often replacing its use with other forms of social interaction and neglecting face-to-face interactions as a result, which can lead to feelings of loneliness in those challenged or affected by it.
Social Isolation and Alienation
For many, isolation today can stem from a general feeling of mental disconnectedness and distance from others, that they do not feel as though they can relate as easily to others, as well as the idea that there are less opportunities to genuinely connect with or meet new people anymore. Indeed, we are certainly still feeling the effects of the many businesses that unfortunately had to close down during the pandemic, many of them social places such as pubs or restaurants that would have given many the opportunity to enjoy the company of others.
Mental isolation, loneliness or aloneness however is often brought on by more complex societal changes that can go unnoticed for some time, such as rising levels of individuality leading many to feel as though society is less cohesive in general and that others may not share their beliefs about the world that they do, which can cause a mental rift among people and a sense of loneliness as a result.
What Can We Do To Combat Loneliness?
Despite many of the reasons for our current loneliness epidemic seeming particularly deeply ingrained in our modern society, this is by no means a reason to resign yourself to it if you feel as though you may be suffering as a result, or to believe that there is nothing to be done against it.
Here are some useful tips and methods you can try to help combat feelings of loneliness:
- Try Reconnecting with Others in Person, and be Persistent
Although it sometimes may not feel like it, the internet often tricks us into feeling as though talking to others online and sharing our lives online is an adequate substitute for real social interaction.
This belief can often be detrimental to those that have it and will often result in feelings of isolation. To help fight against this, try reconnecting with friends, even ones you may not have spoken to in some time and arrange to do something in person.
Reconnecting with friends in person as well as catching up with old acquaintances can be a great way to use already existing connections to your advantage, and face to face contact can help you feel connected to others in a more real and intimate way which can help reduce any feelings of loneliness that you might be having.
- Think About What you Really Want out of Social Media
If you think that your social media use may be contributing to some of the isolation you might be experiencing, perhaps think about how you use social media, what you want to get out of it, how it makes you feel when you’re not using it, and whether or not the way you think about and use it is contributing to your feelings of loneliness.
Whilst social media can be healthy with moderate levels of usage, it should by no means be something that is used for many hours a day or at the forefront of your mind when it is not being used. If you do conclude feeling as though some of your thoughts regarding social media might be unhealthy or are in any way contributing to any of your current feelings of loneliness, it may be a good idea to start trying to use it less or in a different way that you currently are.
By no means do you have to quit completely cold turkey, in fact, in most cases this should be advised against as more often than not will usually result in failure, putting your chances of cutting down at risk.
What should be done instead is to simply try cutting down your social media use and try to use it less during the day. If perhaps you are finding it difficult to stop yourself from using social media, there are now many built-in digital wellbeing features that can be used to help you stay away from certain apps which can allow you to set times during the day when certain apps can be used, or timers that lock you out of apps if you use them for too long and reset at the end of the day.
- Spend More Time on Hobbies
Oftentimes, feelings of loneliness or depression can stem from boredom or simply not knowing what to do with oneself, further causing them to ruminate on their own feelings.
Indeed, it’s this same observation that spawned the phrase ‘The devil makes work for idle hands’ and so keeping occupied and spending more time on a hobby, or even reconnecting with an old one can be a great way to stave off feelings of isolation.
- Get Involved in Communities, Online or Otherwise
In keeping with the theme of the previous point, hobbies can be a great way to connect with others around a mutually enjoyed interest, and so getting involved with communities based around such interests can help you to make new connections.
There are many local clubs and communities you can join, but don’t be afraid to look for them on the internet too, as this can also be a good way to find and talk to people with similar interests to your own.
- Don’t Rule out Therapy as an Option
If feelings of loneliness, aloneness and isolation ever become too overwhelming or present within your own mind, it is always important to remember that recovery is possible, and that there are many forms of therapy which can help you better deal with these feelings, the most popular generally being Cognitive Behavioural Therapy.
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